Friday, October 15, 2010

Ah, parenting

"Would you believe this kid who couldn't even hold his own bottle less than two years ago now has the gall to look his two-hundred pound father in the eye and tell him where to get off? What audacity! Obviously there is something deep within his soul that longs for control. He will work at achieving it for the rest of his life." (Dr. James Dobson)
Exhibit one (see first picture): My baby girl. Truly an easy going baby. I never thought that that easy going little baby would grow to be this two year old spitfire who (exhibit two) posses such a drive for control, such a strong sense of independence, and such a stubborn streak. Where did she get that from? Hmmm... yeah, okay I know exactly where it came from, what I really want to know is how do I effectively and lovingly parent this child to help her to become the Godly and naturally born leader that I know she can be? I think I have finally come to the point where I feel like this is it; I need strategy, advice, a guidebook, prayer. Obviously the terrible twos have been exacerbated by everything that goes along with welcoming our new addition (funny that I thought he was going to be the hard part of being a mother to two) but I know that this is not just terrible twos. This is a part of her that will always be there, I should know, I've still got it. I need to know how to mold it, how to show her how to use it in positive ways instead of using it to fight us at every corner... and straightway... and dead end.

Examples:
"Aydin, it's time to get dressed." She stops in her doorway, turns, puts her hand up and screams "NO MAMA! I do it!" She runs to her closet, while making sure that I'm not following her, and picks out her own outfit."

She points to one of the ribbons on her pinwheel and says pink (none of them are pink, and she really knows her colors). I say "no, what color is that? You know it." She points to it again, "pink." She then points to the rest of them saying, "pink, pink, pink, pink" and smiles with sass.

Jesse was trying to put her down for a nap the other day, and was on the losing end of the battle. After about an hour of trying to get her to sleep he says, "You need to lay down and go to sleep. I'll be back to check on you." He left and not one minute later we heard her door open. He saw her spot him, out of the corner of his eye, and she closed her door as fast as she could. When he went to check on her she was in bed and sat up and said "nap all done, play time."

I know, I know, this sounds like every other two year old, but this is how she responds to most situations. Funny and frustrating at the same time. Eh, we'll figure it out. With the help of good old Dr. Dobson, I will conquer her. I kid, I kid... kind of. She is such a loving, sensitive little girl. She has an amazing sense of humor and although she knows how to push my buttons, she also knows how to melt my heart.

And here is my little man. Almost 2 months old. Look at that amazing smile. Just imagine... it is ten times more dashing in person.

6 comments:

Miller said...

Two year olds are just realizing that they are their own person. I know you don't want to hear that she is just like all two year olds ... but she is. It is a credit to you guys that she feels comfortable testing her boundaries and exploring her ability to make decisions. By letting her make some of these decisions, like what to wear you are helping her become more confident. Sam is going through the same thing. He loves "being the boss" the trick is to pick your battles. That's my two cents... I'm no expert just another mama with a two year old, take it or leave it :).

Kara said...

I'll take it. Thanks, it's good to hear from other people in the same boat.

Nicoolmama said...

I agree with Jennifer. The biggest thing that has helped with Will and his two's is giving him two choices and letting him be the one to pick the outcome(of course, both choices being Mom-approved).

Luckily, distraction still *sometimes* works for him too!
Hugs to you!

Stacia said...

"what I really want to know is how do I effectively and lovingly parent this child to help her to become the Godly and naturally born leader that I know she can be?"

You inspire me as a mother. Really.

Can we hang out sometime SOON? :)

The Longs said...

Hey girl, I feel your pain! I love my kids, but parenting is the hardest thing I have ever done, I don't even know if I am doing it right. I have read some really good books that are encouraging and give me some direction. I can give you the list if you want! :) Besides that I pray a lot! :)

Unknown said...

I love watching you parent. You two are rockstars. David and I were just talking about how much we admire you guys the other day :)